


Hurting

by nemui (ribbonelle)



Series: The Same Way I Do [3]
Category: Akatsuki no Yona | Yona of the Dawn
Genre: Canon Compliant, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Making Out, Manga Spoilers, Requited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-24
Updated: 2017-09-24
Packaged: 2019-01-05 02:11:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12180870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ribbonelle/pseuds/nemui
Summary: Worried and in pain, it was rational to find comfort in one another.





	Hurting

**Author's Note:**

> i caught up with the manga and ahh, my god, SPOILERS of course, but also it's just so good that the dragons protect each other the way they do. my god. kija actually jumped in front of jae-ha. the noise i made when that happened.  
> like the two fics before, this contains late night conversations, kisses. though they talk about things that happen in the manga a lot here, since the information is fresh in my mind! 
> 
> this is significantly different from the other two because it's about their week-long stay in Xing jail and there's a lot of references to things. it's tied in chronologically to the other two fics, bc their relationship has been going on for quite some time here!  
> this is still so very indulgent and probably OOC, because i just want kija to talk about his feelings all the time, and i want jae-ha to be incredibly lovestruck and i wrote this in an hour and a bit bc it was bursting out of me. i haven't slept. so editing and language might be wonky here! sorry for that!

Ever since they were tossed into this cell, Jae-Ha's head had been swimming. He couldn't remember the last time he was hurt this badly—but there was no regret. Just pain and a deep sense of worry, but Jae-Ha knew they did what they needed to do.

But he did think that there was no need for Kija to jump to his defense, taking the strike that was meant for him.

The cell they were in was not in any way comfortable, but everyone else was fast asleep. His friends were fatigued and worried sick, and he couldn't blame them. There really was nothing else to do but wait for Yona and Hak and for their strength to return. 

The head on Jae-Ha's shoulder shifted, and Jae-Ha made sure to stay very, very still. He had a crick in his neck and his left arm was aching like mad, but he would rather hurt than disturb Kija's slumber.

It didn't matter apparently, because Kija lifted his head slowly after a moment, and hissed in pain. 

"Kija," Jae-Ha whispered, unable to keep quiet at Kija's obvious distress, "Are you okay?"

Kija glanced over at him and blearily blinked away his sleepiness, frowning just slightly, "You're awake. I'm alright. It just hurts."

Understatement of the century. Kija had taken direct hits. He was not as hurt as Jae-Ha (which Jae-Ha was eternally thankful for), but his wounds were no laughing matter either. 

"Are _you_  alright?" Kija asked, and while he was whispering he was checking Jae-Ha over like the mother hen he was, light touches against Jae-Ha's bandages to see if they were wet with fresh blood. It was endearing, and extremely Kija. Despite their situation, Jae-Ha was hit with a wave of fondness.

"I'm fine. I had that dream again."

Kija stopped moving around, and his eyes glinted like sapphires in the dim moonlight. He looked into Jae-Ha's eyes, and it was wondrous how beautiful Kija was, even when bloody and hurting.

"The one where you lose your legs?" his voice was quiet. They weren't able to move much, bodies too battered to risk any serious motion, but their heads were turned to face one another and Jae-Ha could see the concern in Kija's expression.

"Yes. That one." 

"Are you feeling alright?"

Jae-Ha considered making a joke out of it, to make light of their circumstance, but somehow he couldn't muster up the humor. He sighed slightly, and leaned sideways against Kija for support, "Not so. But it's better. Better than last night."

Kija was surprisingly solid sometimes, "That's good. It will get better, Jae-Ha. We'll soon be with Yona again, and we'll fight. So focus on recovering, alright?"

Kija was always full of motivation, and Jae-Ha couldn't help a small smile at the reassurance. Trust Kija to be optimistic even like this. "Alright. But you really need to stop trying to force feed me every time that Five Star soldier gives us food."

"But you need to eat a lot so you'd regain your strength!" 

Jae-Ha laughed; Kija's righteousness never failed to amuse. He needed that familiarity, somehow, "I know, I know. I'll eat more. Just be patient about it."

Kija huffed, but tilted his head to somewhat brush his nose against Jae-Ha's cheek, sounding apologetic, "I've never been a patient person, Jae-Ha, and I worry about you. But I'll try to be more gentle about it."

It tugged at Jae-Ha's heartstrings, and he couldn't even try to be dismissive, turning his own face to nuzzle Kija in affection, "You're doing fine, Kija. You're good to me. You're never too rough with me."

It was quiet for a moment, as Kija sighed and their lips met for a small kiss. Moving too much hurt the both of them, so they didn't risk anything more intimate, but it was enough. It was reassuring. 

Kissing hadn't been a thing since they were taken hostage, considering they shared their cell with the rest of their brother-in-arms, but the need for physical comfort became too much for Jae-Ha after a couple of days. Receiving an almost constant supply of contact from Kija during their journey had made him almost an addict, and withdrawal was too much for him to handle in his pained state. 

Besides, Jae-Ha had a feeling that the rest of their crew knew about him and Kija already.

"I worry about Shin-Ah," Kija said eventually, after their kisses had ceased and they were just resting against one another, "I know he said that he'd do anything for us, but I fear for his health. I don't want him to need to use his eyes."

It had become a habit for Kija to speak his mind with Jae-Ha, things that he would never admit to even thinking to anyone else and also himself, but Jae-Ha was always quietly surprised by Kija, anyway. It wasn't a bad thing, because he had silently committed to being anything Kija needed him to be, but he never did get used to it. Of course Kija knew that they were the Four Dragons, and they would do anything for Yona and each other. They all knew this. 

Despite that, Kija secretly worried about it, and Jae-Ha felt another surge of affection for this loyal, devoted man, who was full of love for them. 

"Hopefully he wouldn't have to. But anything can happen before and after Yona and Hak returns, and whatever it is, we'll always look out for each other. So don't worry too much."

Kija nodded, looking grim, and Jae-Ha knew he had more on his mind. Kija spoke in a rush then, as if his thoughts were escaping him, "Zeno...has been especially sacrificial, as well. I'm sure you've noticed. I wish it wasn't this way, I just want everyone to be safe. That's a ridiculous notion, but I want it badly still."

It wasn't always Jae-Ha saw Kija in this state; he was wracked with worry and frustration and pain, and it was considerably new. 

"I wish you could hold me. Or I could hold you, but everything hurts and it's selfish to even want such a thing, but by Hiryuu, Jae-Ha," Kija exhaled, and Jae-Ha felt lost in his eyes, "This really sucks."

He couldn't help it, he laughed. Kija said something, indignant, but Jae-Ha leaned forward to catch his lips in a kiss again. Kija was right. This really sucked. 

Kija's eyes fluttered close, and Jae-Ha regrettably moved away to speak, but the way Kija's eyes were lidded after their kiss made him feel better, "You're right. It really sucks. We're stuck in a situation that can't be remedied at once. But we're together. And we're not dead nor dying, and we _will_ get out of here and reunite with Yona, someway or another. I believe in that. Do you?"

He couldn't remember when he turned into a man who believed in fate. But he meant every word, because despite his dreams and everything else, there was that inescapable pull towards where ever Yona was, and the bond between the Dragons always prevailed. 

The bond they have formed outside of that was just as strong, and Jae-Ha believed in that, more than anything else.

Jae-Ha was always happy to lavish affection and attention on Kija, truth be told, because Kija was dear to him and he always had a weakness for beauty, and Kija was _stunning_ with the intensity of his emotions. But sometimes, like times such as this, Kija would look at him in such a way that Jae-Ha would feel as if he was worshiped. The extent of Kija's devotion rendered him speechless every time. It made him feel requited. 

"I do," Kija said in a breath, and his smile was as radiant as ever, "I believe in that. It'll get better."

Kija tilted his face for another kiss and Jae-Ha instantly complied, never able to leave Kija unkissed for long. Everyone else was asleep and they were hurting, Jae-Ha thought it rational to seek comfort in one another for a little longer.

“I’m sorry I unload my thoughts onto you so much,” Kija said against his lips, rueful.

“You know I don’t mind,” Jae-Ha said in return, “Ever since that first time, you know I don’t. And I love you like this. You seem real when you’re like this.”

Kija huffed again, turning away just for Jae-Ha to press a kiss to his cheek, smiling against his skin. It didn’t take long for Kija to relent; there really seemed to be no room for long-term pettiness when being held hostage to a hostile party.

Jae-Ha felt better. Still worried, and full of dread, but better.

Kija rested his head on Jae-Ha’s shoulder again, and Jae-Ha let him. In the middle of the night, in pain and feeling sentimental, Jae-Ha decided to ask Kija something that he had always meant to.

“Kija?”

“Hm?”

“May I touch your hand?”

It was obvious which hand he was referring to. Kija’s right hand; the hand of the dragon; was the one next to Jae-ha’s, and Jae-Ha had never asked this before now. Kija was quiet, before nodding.

Jae-Ha reached for Kija’s hand, and ran his fingers over the white scales lightly. He traced the shape of the claw, running over Kija’s knuckles and nails, before coming to rest inside Kija’s palm. Jae-Ha curled his fingers around Kija’s hand, and squeezed. Reassurance.

“We’ll be okay.”

Kija exhaled, and Jae-Ha could hear the relief in his voice, “We will.”


End file.
